GREEN ARROW
Green Arrow at high speed draws six armor-piercing arrows and shoots them three at a time through the sparking brass antennae crowning the green figure in an attempt to break all the antennae and dislodge them.
To Starman, Conner Hawke says, "The zen master Ki-no-Li once said that things are not always what they seem. They are usually weirder."
The green chalky fellow stops staggering and stands firmly, for once, with his brain-electrodes shot off.
"Great friend! You have saved me! Now no die among the atoms of your really quite remarkable and pleasant Earth!"
And he triggers his ray-gun, which emits a warbling sine wave of silver distortion, and swings it toward Green Arrow. There are but fractions of a second to act!
Starman, as Green Arrow observes, angles his Gravity Rod to yank the gun out of the weirdo's hand. He'll probably succeed in preventing Green Arrow from not dying among the atoms of the Earth.
Just then, from out of the darkness comes a golden lasso, which heads for Green Arrow. The Shade (who had acquired the lasso from his mother) is attempting to lasso the Green Arrow and pull him out of the way of the blast.
Green Arrow is saved from the ray gun!
"I hate the boxing glove arrow! It makes no sense!" he exclaims, compelled by the Lasso of Truth.
Starman recovers the ray gun and points it at the ground.
"Let's try that again," he says to the green guy. "Who are you, and what do you want?"
"Me am BIZARRO-BRAINIAC! Me am imperfect duplicate of Brainiac. Me copy cities from planets and give them to other planets! This city definitely not from Qward, the Weaponeers' homeworld. Nope, not Qward, you bet!"
"Now me not going to copy Opal City and drop it on New Mars! But without copying gun, this will be easy to accomplish!"
"Me no need any help, and especially not from me arch-enemy Lightseid. Me use antennas to contact him, because they work great and are no broken!"
Thursday, June 8, 2017
Wednesday, June 7, 2017
Remorse in Paradise
"Oh my!" says Lightseid, having sent Hawkgirl off to another planet, but to all appearances having disintegrated her completely. "Me glad this has happened! Me very very glad!"
NOW Valendar would leap on Lightseid and smash him good. If Valendar weren't unconscious.
NOW Valendar would leap on Lightseid and smash him good. If Valendar weren't unconscious.
BRADADADADADADOOOOOM!
BRADADADADADADOOOOM!
Is the sound of the Alpha Beam.
Hawkgirl places the Absorbascon contact pads on Lightseid's temples, allowing him to absorb the thoughts of others, and thinks very hard!
Lightseid snaps awake. The Alpha Beams go in random directions, then once he wakes up, they settle on Hawkgirl and fly right at her!
ZZZAP!
Hawkgirl is now on Apokolips, home of Darkseid. Darkseid's Omega Beam scatters your atoms all across the universe, in equal distances from Apokolips. So Lightseid's Alpha Beam sends you to a distance of zero from Apokolips.
She is in Armaghetto, the steaming ruined shantytown of the Hunger Dogs, Darkseid's work force. Verman Vunderbar, the Minister of Terror, confronts her with his black monocle gleaming from below his severe Prussian haircut.
"A superhero? AGAIN? When will you people learn, there is no escape from Apokolips! Para-demons! SEIZE THE INTRUDER!"
Dragon-faced ape men with mechanical golden wings soar aloft. These are the Para-demons, Darkseid's elite enforcers, made as terrifying and capable as his dark imagination can devise!
Although, they may have been crafted in that order: terrifying, THEN capable. Perhaps their visage is worse than their violence ...
Is the sound of the Alpha Beam.
Hawkgirl places the Absorbascon contact pads on Lightseid's temples, allowing him to absorb the thoughts of others, and thinks very hard!
Lightseid snaps awake. The Alpha Beams go in random directions, then once he wakes up, they settle on Hawkgirl and fly right at her!
ZZZAP!
Hawkgirl is now on Apokolips, home of Darkseid. Darkseid's Omega Beam scatters your atoms all across the universe, in equal distances from Apokolips. So Lightseid's Alpha Beam sends you to a distance of zero from Apokolips.
She is in Armaghetto, the steaming ruined shantytown of the Hunger Dogs, Darkseid's work force. Verman Vunderbar, the Minister of Terror, confronts her with his black monocle gleaming from below his severe Prussian haircut.
"A superhero? AGAIN? When will you people learn, there is no escape from Apokolips! Para-demons! SEIZE THE INTRUDER!"
Dragon-faced ape men with mechanical golden wings soar aloft. These are the Para-demons, Darkseid's elite enforcers, made as terrifying and capable as his dark imagination can devise!
Although, they may have been crafted in that order: terrifying, THEN capable. Perhaps their visage is worse than their violence ...
Tuesday, June 6, 2017
Battle in the Country of the Apes
Hmm...
Clarification...when Hawkgirl flies to talk to opposite-speaker Lightseid, where is he compared to where Swift and the gorilla are?
(In other words, do the gorilla and Swift here this? )
He's at the base of a hill next to the hill on which Swift and Valendar are. So perhaps 100 yards away, but there's no noise beside the chirp of contented birds, so sure, they can hear him.
Swift says to the gorilla. "I have heard that the villain Bizarro always says the opposite of what is true.
"He is...dangerous."
"I'm Hawkgirl!" she says cheerfully enough. "Beautiful place you have here. But we seem to be missing some giraffes..."
(The other part of Hawkgirl's brain is contemplating how to adapt Google translate so people always hear what Lightseid means instead of what he says...)
(The Google to Lightseid idea is quite amusing.)
Swift listens to hear what is said about the giraffes (if anything.)
"The giraffes hate it here! Take them away!"
"May I see them?"
"No! Don't look over there!"
Lightseid gestures grandly to the hill beside which he sits. Giraffes, among many other animals, are grazing and wandering peacefully, trying new foods and making new friends. Lions are combing the hair of small tasty tapirs.
Hawkgirl:
"This is really impressive! What happens now?"
Lightseid:
"No is ready yet for my master stroke, where I hide the Life Equation from NOBODY! Neither here nor on all the other planets! For my bitter enemy Bizarro-Brainiac was no help at all in finally solving the Life Equation, which I care NOTHING about!"
Hawkgirl:
"It looks like paradise... but are you leaving the animals and plants here or taking them somewhere else?"
Lightseid:
"Nothing will be happy and free, nowhere! Life will be cast down and abolished!" says Lightseid.
"That's villain talk," confirms Valendar. He unlimbers his nine-barreled science shotgun.
Hawkgirl:
"These guys always say the opposite of what they mean... so Everything will be happy and free, everywhere. Life will be uplifted and thrive."
"Unless we stop him!" says Valendar.
"Let's stop him!" says Swift. To Valendar, she says, "Are there more people back where you come from who might help? I could run there and spread the news...if there's a way to run there."
"Gorilla City has a whole city-full of gorillas!" says Valendar. "But no one can see the city unless the Flash is with them."
"Hmm...we'd better go solve this ourselves, then!"
Valendar leaps to his feet, bends over to knuckle the ground, and using all four limbs gallops toward Lightseid, brandishing his shotgun.
"Lightseid! I am strong! I am fast! I am Valendar! Lie down and admit I am better than you!"
"Yes," says Lightseid, smiling craggily. "You are better. Me no prove it now."
And his eyes suddenly fill with seething darkness.
"Alpha Beam leave your value ENTIRELY IN DOUBT!" says Lightseid, standing dramatically. "Many atoms will remain of you!"
Clarification...when Hawkgirl flies to talk to opposite-speaker Lightseid, where is he compared to where Swift and the gorilla are?
(In other words, do the gorilla and Swift here this? )
He's at the base of a hill next to the hill on which Swift and Valendar are. So perhaps 100 yards away, but there's no noise beside the chirp of contented birds, so sure, they can hear him.
Swift says to the gorilla. "I have heard that the villain Bizarro always says the opposite of what is true.
"He is...dangerous."
"I'm Hawkgirl!" she says cheerfully enough. "Beautiful place you have here. But we seem to be missing some giraffes..."
(The other part of Hawkgirl's brain is contemplating how to adapt Google translate so people always hear what Lightseid means instead of what he says...)
(The Google to Lightseid idea is quite amusing.)
Swift listens to hear what is said about the giraffes (if anything.)
"The giraffes hate it here! Take them away!"
"May I see them?"
"No! Don't look over there!"
Lightseid gestures grandly to the hill beside which he sits. Giraffes, among many other animals, are grazing and wandering peacefully, trying new foods and making new friends. Lions are combing the hair of small tasty tapirs.
Hawkgirl:
"This is really impressive! What happens now?"
Lightseid:
"No is ready yet for my master stroke, where I hide the Life Equation from NOBODY! Neither here nor on all the other planets! For my bitter enemy Bizarro-Brainiac was no help at all in finally solving the Life Equation, which I care NOTHING about!"
Hawkgirl:
"It looks like paradise... but are you leaving the animals and plants here or taking them somewhere else?"
Lightseid:
"Nothing will be happy and free, nowhere! Life will be cast down and abolished!" says Lightseid.
"That's villain talk," confirms Valendar. He unlimbers his nine-barreled science shotgun.
Hawkgirl:
"These guys always say the opposite of what they mean... so Everything will be happy and free, everywhere. Life will be uplifted and thrive."
"Unless we stop him!" says Valendar.
"Let's stop him!" says Swift. To Valendar, she says, "Are there more people back where you come from who might help? I could run there and spread the news...if there's a way to run there."
"Gorilla City has a whole city-full of gorillas!" says Valendar. "But no one can see the city unless the Flash is with them."
"Hmm...we'd better go solve this ourselves, then!"
Valendar leaps to his feet, bends over to knuckle the ground, and using all four limbs gallops toward Lightseid, brandishing his shotgun.
"Lightseid! I am strong! I am fast! I am Valendar! Lie down and admit I am better than you!"
"Yes," says Lightseid, smiling craggily. "You are better. Me no prove it now."
And his eyes suddenly fill with seething darkness.
"Alpha Beam leave your value ENTIRELY IN DOUBT!" says Lightseid, standing dramatically. "Many atoms will remain of you!"
Monday, June 5, 2017
The Master of the Flowers
"I would be happy to help. My search of the continent has not turned up any giraffes. My friend would like to help, too. May I introduce Hawkgirl."
Swift makes a courteous gesture from the gorilla to Hawkgirl.
Hawkgirl gives one of those elaborate curtsies they do on her home planet where honor is everything and medieval weapons are favored.
"Charmed, to be sure," she says demurely. Then she clears her throat.
"I have detected a strange--dare I say bizarre--presence in the center of the greening."
She bites her lower lip. "Jack--I mean Starman--says the usual way to beat Bizarro is with trickery. In other words, don't let him get close enough to punch you or stay in one place long enough for him to use eyebeams or anything like that... I wonder what he's up to?"
"They have left the continent? Oh dear!" says Valendar.
"Or could they, perhaps, be on a near-lying island, such as Zanzibar or Madagascar?"
Valendar says, "Bizarro? I do not know of this one. We in Gorilla City generally only know Flash villains. Could it be the Weather Wizard?"
"Have you heard of Superman?"
"Mmm ... the strong one? One of Flash's Friends?"
"Yes! He wears red, white and blue. And he flies. Sometimes."
"I suppose any friend of the Flash is ... nice. Nice to have."
Then Valendar has a troubling thought.
"Why, are we only getting him, not Daughter Flash?"
Sheilandra AKA Hawkgirl tries to explain. "Oh, no. Bizarro probably isn't here to help you. Probably. He's doing his own thing. I wouldn't say he's a friend of the Flash, would you, Swift?"
Swift says decisively. "No. Bizzaro is definitely not a friend! The is the enemy of another hero."
Swift says, "I am here to help you. While I have searched the continent diligently...they could be hidden inside or...underground!
"Or, they may have been removed entirely...and it is not just giraffes. Others are missing, too."
HAWKGIRL:
"I wonder why he's creating now..."
She flies in for a closer look.
In the center of all the lush flowering fruiting greenery is a strange man. Massive, pale, slab-sided as though hewn from a massive block of chalk, he sits upon an impromptu throne of limestone, holding a butterfly in his granitic palm.
"Goodbye!" he greets Hawkgirl. "Me am Lightseid, imperfect duplicate of Darkseid. Me am sad to see you. Get out of your country, the worst place on Earth!"
Swift makes a courteous gesture from the gorilla to Hawkgirl.
Hawkgirl gives one of those elaborate curtsies they do on her home planet where honor is everything and medieval weapons are favored.
"Charmed, to be sure," she says demurely. Then she clears her throat.
"I have detected a strange--dare I say bizarre--presence in the center of the greening."
She bites her lower lip. "Jack--I mean Starman--says the usual way to beat Bizarro is with trickery. In other words, don't let him get close enough to punch you or stay in one place long enough for him to use eyebeams or anything like that... I wonder what he's up to?"
"They have left the continent? Oh dear!" says Valendar.
"Or could they, perhaps, be on a near-lying island, such as Zanzibar or Madagascar?"
Valendar says, "Bizarro? I do not know of this one. We in Gorilla City generally only know Flash villains. Could it be the Weather Wizard?"
"Have you heard of Superman?"
"Mmm ... the strong one? One of Flash's Friends?"
"Yes! He wears red, white and blue. And he flies. Sometimes."
"I suppose any friend of the Flash is ... nice. Nice to have."
Then Valendar has a troubling thought.
"Why, are we only getting him, not Daughter Flash?"
Sheilandra AKA Hawkgirl tries to explain. "Oh, no. Bizarro probably isn't here to help you. Probably. He's doing his own thing. I wouldn't say he's a friend of the Flash, would you, Swift?"
Swift says decisively. "No. Bizzaro is definitely not a friend! The is the enemy of another hero."
Swift says, "I am here to help you. While I have searched the continent diligently...they could be hidden inside or...underground!
"Or, they may have been removed entirely...and it is not just giraffes. Others are missing, too."
HAWKGIRL:
"I wonder why he's creating now..."
She flies in for a closer look.
In the center of all the lush flowering fruiting greenery is a strange man. Massive, pale, slab-sided as though hewn from a massive block of chalk, he sits upon an impromptu throne of limestone, holding a butterfly in his granitic palm.
"Goodbye!" he greets Hawkgirl. "Me am Lightseid, imperfect duplicate of Darkseid. Me am sad to see you. Get out of your country, the worst place on Earth!"
A Strange Encounter in Opal city's alleys
Monkey King.
"Okay ship, sic them." he will then go join Green Arrow and stop the robots.
before he leaves the ship, monkey realizes that Star Man can help and would probably be mad if he didn't let him in on the action. So he calls Stars on the Mega Phone (the secret communication device used by martians in the atmosphere. it amplifies one's voice to be louder and is totally not a normal megaphone.)
"Hey Star Man! Green Arrow knows where the robots are coming from! this way!" he then tells the ship to fly him to Green Arrow.
A Martian flying saucer silently leaps to one inch away from Green Arrow's leg. Moments later, Starman arrives, pulled by the gleaming golden glow of his Gravity Rod.
"Stars, arrows ... we got this covered," says Starman. "Hey, Conner. Got any zen insights for this situation? Because little wind-up candy thieves sounds like more of a Teen Titans Go kinda menace to me. ... oh, oh! Want to introduce yourself, baldy?"
From the side of the brass mechanical city, a strange figure stirs. He is pale green, jagged and cracked like a sculpture hewn out of green foam. Six brass antennae bristle from his head, connected by fitful sparks. Every time a spark shoots from one antenna to the other, the strange figure jerks an arm, or a leg, like a spastic marionette.
He wears a pink leotard with white boots and trunks, and has a tapered silver ray-gun in his left hand.
"Go! M-m-m-me wish you harm! Me a-a-am no the master here! This YOUR city am going to be, so come closer! T-t-t-tic! Or me am NOT shoot!"
Introductions in Paradise
Hawkgirl politely taps Swift on the shoulder to get her attention. "I know it's beautiful--but we really should find Bizarro..."
Swift blinks and nods, "Right-o!"
She runs off to do it...and then realizes that she left Hawkgirl behind and comes back, only seconds after she left, creating a wind to nicely stir Hawkgirl's hair.
"Ready! Lead the way!"
"Well, this gorilla scout works for King Solovar. And King Solovar was trying to contact your dad, so... maybe you'd best talk with the scout...and then the king? That is, if the scanner can't pick up Bizarro close by..." She does scan the area again.
"Ah! That's a slightly different manner."
Swift approaches the ape and bows slightly. "Sir, I am the daughter of the Flash. A little birdy* told me that you were looking for my father."
*--well, someone with wings.
"Indeed! I am Valendar, one of Gorilla City's Jungle Rangers. My king, the wise and ancient Solovar, has bid me discover why the giraffes have vanished. And who better to help us than Human Girl Flash, daughter of Human Flash?"
Also, Hawkgirl's scanner picks up a bizarre life-form at the epicenter of all the lush greenery.
Swift blinks and nods, "Right-o!"
She runs off to do it...and then realizes that she left Hawkgirl behind and comes back, only seconds after she left, creating a wind to nicely stir Hawkgirl's hair.
"Ready! Lead the way!"
"Well, this gorilla scout works for King Solovar. And King Solovar was trying to contact your dad, so... maybe you'd best talk with the scout...and then the king? That is, if the scanner can't pick up Bizarro close by..." She does scan the area again.
"Ah! That's a slightly different manner."
Swift approaches the ape and bows slightly. "Sir, I am the daughter of the Flash. A little birdy* told me that you were looking for my father."
*--well, someone with wings.
"Indeed! I am Valendar, one of Gorilla City's Jungle Rangers. My king, the wise and ancient Solovar, has bid me discover why the giraffes have vanished. And who better to help us than Human Girl Flash, daughter of Human Flash?"
Also, Hawkgirl's scanner picks up a bizarre life-form at the epicenter of all the lush greenery.
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